Category Archives: Absurd

Walk with my tits

The new video by the “Siggas” is an ode to fat people who love to “walk with their tits” and engage in obnoxious public dancing. Oh, and they dress up as green aliens.

Advertisements

Jennifer poops at parties? Flula’s take on american idioms

So, we posted a video from this Flula guy a few weeks a go about the idiom “shooting fish in barrel” and people really seemed to like it. Turns out, there is much more where that came from.

Flula is a german DJ and record producer who loves to make fun of odd  american idioms, as he moved to LA a few years ago and began to hear more and more of them.

Needless to say, he struggles to understand the sense of these idioms.

Here are some of his funniest videos:

Party poopers

Daddy long legs

Happy as a clams

Oh, and he also masters the art of tourette prank calling:

WTF is a whale doing in this story?

Best movie trailer ever – 2016

“2016”is  an action-packed blockbuster film from Ghana where aliens invade earth and men dodge bullets.

I think they may have used microsoft paint to draw up some of the “special” effects.

Anyway, the plot line seems  – interesting.

See for yourself.

Haven’t had enough?

Oh and by the way, both of these are based on true stories.

Oh I’m just smoking a cigarette, gasing up my car…

Wait, what?

How dumb do you have to be to light a smoke while holding a gas pump?

This dumb:

Oh , no.

‎. . . . .. . . . . . . . . . . ,.-‘”. . . . . . . . . .“~.,
. . . . . . . .. . . . . .,.-”. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .“-.,
. . . . .. . . . . . ..,/. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ”:,
. . . . . . . .. .,?. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .\,
. . . . . . . . . /. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ,}
. . . . . . . . ./. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ,:`^`.}
. . . . . . . ./. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ,:”. . . ./
. . . . . . .?. . . __. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . :`. . . ./
. . . . . . . /__.(. . .“~-,_. . . . . . . . . . . . . . ,:`. . . .. ./
. . . . . . /(_. . ”~,_. . . ..“~,_. . . . . . . . . .,:`. . . . _/
. . . .. .{.._$;_. . .”=,_. . . .“-,_. . . ,.-~-,}, .~”; /. .. .}
. . .. . .((. . .*~_. . . .”=-._. . .“;,,./`. . /” . . . ./. .. ../
. . . .. . .\`~,. . ..“~.,. . . . . . . . . ..`. . .}. . . . . . ../
. . . . . .(. ..`=-,,. . . .`. . . . . . . . . . . ..(. . . ;_,,-”
. . . . . ../.`~,. . ..`-.. . . . . . . . . . . . . . ..\. . /\
. . . . . . \`~.*-,. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ..|,./…..\,__
,,_. . . . . }.>-._\. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .|. . . . . . ..`=~-,
. .. `=~-,_\_. . . `\,. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .\
. . . . . . . . . .`=~-,,.\,. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .\
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . `:,, . . . . . . . . . . . . . `\. . . . . . ..__
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .`=-,. . . . . . . . . .,%`>–==“
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . _\. . . . . ._,-%. . . ..`

Zoolander’s model friends could tell you this is not a good idea:

 

It’s like having a cake, putting it in a barrel, shooting it, then eating it..

It just doesn’t make sense!!

I mean, where would you get a barrel, it’s 2011, for christ’s sake!

Chinese Walmarts (or houses of horror)

Courtesy of Buzfeed, here is what you could find at a chinese walmart and probably couldn’t find… anywhere else.

Where to begin? The large dead crocodiles?

Ew, what’s that in its mouth (asks the honey badger).

Next up: living turtles and jumbo toads. You’re perfect sunday afternoon snack.

Now, that looks like a fun party.

But there are more than just exotic reptiles.

Look at these one-piece “anti bacteral” men’s underwear (or gymnast suit?).

And because the chinese know marketing and sales, they come up with exciting consumer friendly combos that make total sense. Like corn oil and orange juice.

Why the f*** not.

Finally, of course, you will find things that you’ve never even known existed.

I can take a few wild guesses: headless jumbo dinosaur shrimp? dragon jerky?

I just don’t know.

Ketchupbot the robot

So, it’s pretty clear now that it’s only a matter of time before robots take over the world, enslave and harvest us.

But, not yet.

We still get to create and control these amazing little robots to help us minimize the amount of effort we need to produce to get through the day unscathed.

Like this awesome ketchupbot:

It’s almost like having your own little pokemon.

– “Ketchupbot! Uuuuuuuuse ketchup laser splaaaaash!”

– “Ketchupbot, Ketchupbot”

(wow, that was a weird day dream)

Anyways, bottom line is… Robots are pretty cool. That said, none are as cool as…

…DJ Roomba!

Sissy Men..

…they like engagement rings.

No, just no. That is not acceptable. (look how the had to add the word heterosexual..)

(disclaimer, Oh it runs backwards loves gays, not like that, we just like their colorful hats…and the fact they leave more women for the rest of us)

I mean, no. Just really, no.

Hockey brawls in Finland

This hockey brawl took place this weekend in Finland in a game between the Pelicans from wherever and HIFK. 439 Penalty minutes were called as the players mistook the rink for a real life battle royale.

Now, if you look at the left of your screen after the face-off (about 20 seconds in), number 3 doesn’t find anyone to fight with !!!!!!!!!!!! Look at the disappointment. He’s like a kid who didn’t get a nintendo 64 for christmas in 1998.

It’s the musical chairs, Finnish style. Gotta love it.

“Stick. Gloves. Shirt.”

Creepy staring is creepy

Especially when it is totally uncalled for.

Like at a cricket match in Bangaldesh.

This is a skill only zoolander and a couple of people in the world can master. Including this man:

%d bloggers like this: